what is worse than losing your phone? having it destroyed because you were texting while driving causing an accident and you are not eligible for and upgrade for another two months.

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What do you call a bunch of black guys on mars? a problem What do you call 1 million black guys on mars? a bigger problem What do you call all the black guys on mars? a solution

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What do you call the fear of anteaters? Stupid.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are productive members of society. -Canis

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Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

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whats white and looks like paper paper

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What did the Mexican Have for Thanksgiving Dinner? A Turkey you racist!

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An iman, a rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. It's not the same bar. They feel uncomfortable mixing together and this makes me sad.

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What happens if you play CS:GO? Well you loose alot of fucking money.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Me. Me Who? Me. Uh.

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What did the cop say to the black man being arrested? His Miranda rights.

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What did Superman say when he forgot his cape? "Where's my cape?"

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A man burps while sitting at dinner. Everyone suddenly stops eating and stares at him. How does he get out of it? Answer: He says, "Excuse me."

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what is the difference between a banana and an orange? bread.

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What do Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have in common? They are both blind.

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What is funnier than 24? 25! hahahahahaha!

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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Guy 1: Hey, do you like fish sticks? Guy2: Yeah. Guy 1: Me too

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Well... At that time everyone expected that the only people that knew hypnosis where either "born with the gift from the stars" or was some old beard man that spent "hundreds of years in the mountains".or a wizard or a shamanic priest, or well some guy in a particular stupid suit of sorts, it increased its potency simple as that, as having people stare at me and laugh because "You are not some beardy guru master" is a pretty bad start for the effective use of mass hypnosis. Mono-ideoism actually just means really concentrated focus on a single object or state of mind, the thing about the name (aside from sounding kinda mono-idiotic) is that strong focus alone does NOT lead to a state of relaxation which is one of the prime requirements to achieve a state of trance, I mean try focusing on something really hard and your body produces a huge amount of beta waves, aka stress. All of that is bullshit, but my horrible childhood did leave me with the "gift" to space out pretty quickly, so I learned it pretty fast without really knowing what it was at first.

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Why is the chicken dead? It tried to cross the road.

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What's the difference between a Corvette and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

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What do you do with a dead black man? Respect his final wishes and provide him with proper funeral services.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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