how big is a black mans penis? idk ask his wife

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What do you catch a baby with? A pitchfork

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a yacht. Unfortunately the yacht is in a shop and all 3 of them sustain injuries following impact with the concrete floor.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

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9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

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your mom

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What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

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What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

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what kind of mexicans are NOT in the U.S. -legal

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Holy crap it's a talking muffin!

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Martin Skrtel walks into a bar The bar breaks, Martin then pays for any damages caused

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Q:what has two legs and bleeds A: a dog cut in half

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What did the white guy say to the black guy? What's up?

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why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

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What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

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And love is, bein' the owner of a company that makes rape whistles and even though you started the company with good intentions trying to reduce the rate of rape, now you don't wanna reduce it at all cuz if the rape rate declines you'll see an equal decline in whistle sales. Without rapists, who's gonna buy your whistles? Who's gonna buy your whistles? Love is all about whistles.

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Fucked up quotes: "When walking trough hell, keep going!" (I just turn back and walk the other way thank you, I mean worst case I walk trough heaven right?" "Never give up, ever ever ever ever ever..." (Ill just end it with etc because I gave up something as hard as... Typing?) "Curiosity killed the cat" (Translated: "Curiosity kills, stay inside forever" What?)

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An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

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what do you call an elevator full of white people. a box of crackers

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What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

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Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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