what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

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How do you make an electrician fall over? You hit him hard with a lamp

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What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

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Did you hear about the guy who broke his legs? His legs were broke.

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Hey, have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. Neither has he.

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A bench doesn't breathe, apparently Mexicans do.

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What's the difference between a cow and a cow? Nothing, they are both the same.

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What's the difference between my father and my mother. My father isn't an alcoholic

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There once was a man named Steve. One day, Steve stumbled stupidly, shredding his shirt, shoes and shorts and subsequently shocking Susie; a small shy salsa student. When he arrived home, Steve's wife asked "how was your day dear?" Steve panicked at the thought of having to explain this traumatic event, but thankfully he had undergone speech therapy for his lisp.

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sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssLOLIAMINTHESIDEBAR:Dyouaregaylol

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

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What's better than Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels Jr.

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Why is siracha taste so good on chicken? Because it compliments the meat.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

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If I give you 5 dollars, and you give me 5 dollars, then we both still have 5 dollars, which when combined will equal 10 dollars. Meaning we could buy something that cost's 10 dollars or less. But we should probably also factor in tax, so we should only buys something that costs a little over 9 dollars.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got run over by a semi and died.

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Take sebastian deep into the woods and put him down quickly

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What is black and blue? A pen with reversable ink.

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How high is a Chinaman

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Penis.

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A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat off, and the barman chuckles.

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What's better than winning $5000 a week for life?! Winning any larger sum of money a week for life, and sex.

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What's red, green, and goes about 200 mph A fire hidrent I lied about the green and the 200 mph

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops