What did the woman say just before she was stabbed eleven times in the chest thus killing her? Nothing, she had been gagged.

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yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

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Whats long and black? The unemployment line

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Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

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tims sty:)

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A married couple is arguing over the temperature in their house. The wife wants it at 62 degrees and the husband wants it at 74. What should they do? Nothing while they are arguing their daughter decides to put it at 32 and freeze them to death

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Is your plant made out of Osmium, Molybdenum, Silicon and Sulfur? Because it's going through OsMoSiS. That was just a joke, not a pick up line. Unless I was giving a pick-up line to your plant, which I definitely wasn't...

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Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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What did the psychopath say to the firefighter? Can you lend me a few bucks? My clothes are dirty and I need to go to the launromat.

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? The same amount as white people, stop being racist.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? ... THE DOOR!!

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So how does the chicken cross the road? He doesn't, chickens live on farms.

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why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

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Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

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What's black and white and red all over? A nun that was stabbed to death.

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What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

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How do u get Hitler out of a car? You open the door.

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What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

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What does water smell like? water.

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You will not press the like button.

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how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

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You're Mother's so fat, she sat on a chair, and it broke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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