A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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At the time my grandfather came round to visit, what was happening in Australia? A giant spider was giving birth.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

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why did jimmy win the lottery? WAFFLE

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A man is writing with a #2 pencil. He looks down and sees that it says "Made in China." He shrugs and continues writing

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roses are red voilets are blue my dog stinks and so do you!

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender can you throw me a beer and the bartender says yes and he throws him the beer and the man says I can't catch I have the smallest hands in the world and the bartender says go across the street there is a guineas book of world record store an check if you h e the smallest hands and he does so the next day he goes back and asks for another beer and the bartender throws him a beer and say I cant catch cause I have the smallest feet in the world and he goes across the street and checks and he does and then the third day he goes back to the bar and asks for a beer and the bartendor throws him another beer and says I can't catch I have the smallest penis in the world so he goes to the guiness book o world record store and then goes bac to the bar and asks..... Who's austin bell?????

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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black people

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why did bob hit Jim Because bob didn't like Jim

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A man walked into a bar. He said ow.

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Why did Sally's Ice Cream melt? Sally was on Fire

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What was unprecedented about Roosevelt running for president in 1940? He had polio, he couldn't run!

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If i open this door you can go trough it

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What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

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What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

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what did the frog say to the fence? chicken

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Why did Sarah limp to school? Because she got hit by a tree

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There were two busses. The one was red, the other one went to France.

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Oh yeah? Well you're as gay as this joke!

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What do you call a black man on steroids? Strong.

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womens rights.

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Knock Knock. Who's There. Teenage Pregnancy

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Q: Why doesn't the young lady speak very much? A: Because she's a whore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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