Why did the blind man die? He had eye surgery and the doctor told him when he first opened his eyes there would be a very bright light, turns out he also had alzheimers and wandered onto the train tracks

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What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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I like my coffee like I like my women..... Without Hepatitis.

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why did the man die? he was shot

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A man walks into a bar and says "ow"

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Hey, i just met you. And this is crazy! But im on bathsalts ! *GAUH* Your face looks tasty!! :D

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Pokemon are fictional, therefore Pikachu is fictional, meaning he would never be at a bus station in the real world at all.

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i didn't listen to a word you just said but...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA

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Why did the man fall of the cliff? A: Because someone pushed him.

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Funny names Alec Balls Isaac Balls Dick Hedd Willy lickerr Lydia Stick Gaylord Sugar Fanny Gouger

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If there are 2 narwhals and two apples, why is each of the narwhals happy? Because each is a narwhal.

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It's about 3 days from Mother's Day. What do you get her? Nothing. Nothing is a very powerful thing. hehe thats what she said.

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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What do you call when you see a man murder 8 black guys? The police.

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Q. What do you call a guy who only drinks lite beer. A. His name.

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head under water until water gets into her lungs and she cant breathe.

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What did the white guy say to the black guy? What's up?

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Women's rights

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

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What do you get when you put the head of a lion on the body of an eagle?2 dead animals and a fine for killing protected species.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the batmobile? Robin, get in the batmobile

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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