Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

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A middle aged bald man goes to Chuck E. Cheese with a hood and a lump in his back pocket. He has a somewhat enjoyable time with his offspring and leaves.

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Person 1: "Ask me if I'm a rock." Person 2: "Are you a rock?" Person 1: "No."

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

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The original Moral Man has left Horsehead network, but I will keep monitoring this section for like 3 hours... Then probably never again on this shit site it barely works ffs! Moral: "Turn every stone, and you might find a penny, turn every penny and you might find a stone that stone is in our shoe, kick it away, crush it, destroy it"

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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I was walking down the street then my hands were itchy so I stuck em in my pockets Jk, I'm a donkey. We don't have hands

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Why did the cat cross the road? To see its mom who was lying dead on the other side

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game"

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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What's black and has a beary taste? A black bear.

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Why didn't the Alzheimers patient put on her shoes? She didn't leave the elderly home that day, thus taking away the need to put on shoes.

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Yo mamma is so pretty, she is frequently complimented on her good looks.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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whats better than an anti joke? a joke that you find funyer than an anti joke

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A white,mexican and asian man are walking together on the beach. They find a genie lamp and the genie says"since there are 3 of u u each get one wish" the black man says " i wish that all the mexicans would go back to mexico. " the asian man says " i wish all the asians would go back to asia" and the white man says " wait so the mexicans and asians arent in america right?" the genie said "that is correct!" the white man says " oh ok ill just taqke a coke then!"

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? get in the car

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how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

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what did the farmer say when he lost his red tractor?

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whats green and falls from trees, pool tables.

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Guess what I saw today? Everything I looked at.

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No one walks into a bar... because it was closed.

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What is the difference between a deer and a child in africa? Why does it matter? They're both being hunted.

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What was the last thing Batman said to Robin before they got in the Batmobile Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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