What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

What's worse than finding another worm in your apple? Another Holocaust

book 'em danno

So you go home and get on the computer. You have no internet so your stuck playing pinball.

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait; it would be quite unsanitary to talk about my genitals in front of you.

God said onto john "come forth and receive eternal life" john came fifth and received a toaster.

Black...

Why is siracha taste so good on chicken? Because it compliments the meat.

Q: How Do You Stop a Bus? A: Pull the Brakes so it comes to a absolute stop.

Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

Roses are red, Stones are grey, This poem is obvious, You don't say??

Want to hear a joke? Me neither.

Q: What's multicoloured and spins around while screaming in agony? A: A clown in a washing machine.

Why did the little boy have to go to the hospital? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a train.

How do you circumsize a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.

Who saw 9/11 as a miracle? The undertakers

How did the Jew escape the concentration camp? He didn't he was caught and put in the gas chamber.

What did the blind, deaf, and dumb child get for Christmas? Cancer.

What would you do when pigs fly? Pigs cannot fly, therefore this question is impractical.

nice tits.

I hate it when you can't tell whether a person is male or female.

Q: How do you know your gay? A: When you have unexpected desires for men, which is a sin to a religion, so the choice of being gay is against the bible and you would soon be sent to the pit of fire we call hell.

What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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