How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You just glass her.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

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Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Little kid asks his mom: "Why do zombies eat people?" His mom says: "Becasue honey, your MEAT"

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How did the young child react when a bullet went through his head? He fell to the ground and his heart stopped beating.

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"Hheheheh Hey Butthead"- "Were Gonna Score!"

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yo mamma's so fat, when she jumped into the ocean, everyone yelled "tsunami!".

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Do you want to hear a racist joke? I hate black people...

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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A man goes to the movies with his wife, two hours later they drive home and find their house just the way they left it.

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Q: Why did the kid cross the playground? A: To get to the other slide

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One day, a bear happoned across a man and said "How do you do today good sir?" but the man ran away screaming "OH CRAP, BEARS!!!!" because it just sounded like bear growling (which i would love to dedicate to my friend Chris Bradley, just to make the ball to stick ratio too high)

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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cum on guys, gay jokes are mean

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my wife came out of the kitchen....

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why did matt die? He had cancer

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Why did the jew give all his money away to charity? -No I'm kidding, he didn't.

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whats brown and sticky? a sweaty mexican

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Whats worse than falling off a bike? rape.

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A middle aged man goes to a psychic. She tells him that he has prostate cancer, and his wife has been cheating on him for the past 3 years.

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Knock knock.. Who's there? Breaking. Breaking who? Im breaking up with you.

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Why didnt your daughter come home? The door was locked

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. Why? A. To get to the other side. A. Knock, Knock. B. Who's there? A. The chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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