What did the janitor have for breakfast? Food

What's worse than AIDS? Not getting your sandwich.

whats the difference between a mexican and a fish? one is a human being while the other is a fish, what did you expect?

Are you related to Yoda? because yoda-licious!!!!

roses are red violets are red everything is red who set my house on fire

Robin get in the Batmobile.

A zebra dies and goes to animal heaven. All the animals around him are trotting, flying, jumping, each according to its own species, in the kind of bliss that only eternity can bring. But the zebra is not impressed and mopes through heaven's green fields. A giraffe notices his languid stupor and asks, "Why so glum, pal?" The zebra mournfully replies, "All my life I've wondered if I was black with white stripes or white with black stripes." The giraffe, hoping to get the zebra to some answers as quickly as possible, suggests, "Why not go as God?" The zebra, somewhat taken aback by the notion that God might give him an audience, replies, "Oh, I can do that?" The giraffe says, "Sure, I'll show you the way!" The giraffe leads the zebra to a great tabernacle of gold and points the way up a long stairway of diamond. The zebra follows the stairs up to two great ivory doors. But no matter what he tried, the zebra couldn't get the door open. The only animals that could open the door for him would be the primates because of their opposable digits, but the zebra wasn't much of a social animal, so he didn't have any friends. He spent eternity with no answer to his question.

What's little and very sad? A 5-year old locked in a cage.

Q: whats worse that sucking at piano A: the world blowing up

Roses are red violets are blue I think you re stupid go eat a shoe

how long did it take the blonde to solve the rubiks cube when she knew the algorithm? Approximately 6.73 minutes.

why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? he got hit by a bus why was the little girl happy? because she found an icecream cone

Johnny woke up christmas morning, went downstairs and opened his presents to find he had an iPhone, iPad,Ps3 Laptop, the full lot. Then his mate came around and Johnny bragged about all the stuff he had got. Then his mate replied," I wish i had cancer".

Why didn't the man go to work? He got stabbed.

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The entire population.

Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

Want some candy? Lol jk get in my van.

Your mama's so stupid that i wouldn't be surprised if you were to tell me that she didn't graduate high school.

why cant monkeys swim? cause they dont have staberlizers.

What's more fun than a negative pregnancy test? Nothing.

Simba was moving slow,so I told him to MUFASA!!!

why did the chicken cross the road it was being chased by the man from the chicken slaughter house.

Why did he have to die so young? It just isn't fair... In all considerations, the bullet didn't ask to become embedded in his skull either.

A bald guy walks out of a bar Prostate cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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