How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

What's big, wet and hairy? Not what you think it is.

What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

A twelve year old walks into a bar. How Tragic

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Well, she did.

What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

What did the cow say to the bull. they had kids because they shared an interest in being silent.

Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Q: Whats worse than 17 babies in 1 bin. A: 1 baby in 17 bins. Q: Whats worse than that. A: 17 bins in 1 baby.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Shes been dead for some time now.

Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

So you there Red?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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