What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

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Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

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Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

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Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

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1,984

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Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

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Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

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what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

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Are you a tree? No.

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Where is my tractor?

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Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

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What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

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America

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What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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