What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

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A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

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What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

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What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

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Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

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What did the white cop say to the black thug? he didn't... he got shot before he could say anything

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

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Word play, punch-line, joke.

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Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

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Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

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Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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