What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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I have no soul so I must consume yours

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banana

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Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

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when ever i finish a sentence say im a man Me :i met a girl You:im a man Me: i invited her to my place You: im a man Me: we sleept together You:im a man Me:she wisperd in my ear You: im a man

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Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

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What did I write on this website? This antijoke.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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What do you get when you cross and unicorn with a loaf of bread? Cantaloupe

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Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

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Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

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Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his wife and kids.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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