Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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whats worse than 9/11 a paper cut

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What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

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What did I write on this website? This antijoke.

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

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Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

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What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

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Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poetry show me your tits

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Har har hey

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Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

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A man dressed in a white sheet shows up at an African American's door, they sit in the living room drinking coffee and watching the weather.

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My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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