A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

Roses are red Violets are blue Last night I came home to find my entire family murdered....

What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

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Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

pigs are sometimes pink GOSH

What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

boobs

What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

I saw a man lying on the floor. He ate too much cake.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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