If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

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how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

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What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

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A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

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What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

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My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

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If you have a green ball in your left hand and a green ball your right hand, what do you have? Kermit the Frog's undivided attention

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when I shaved this morning....... hairs went down the sink

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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The Olympics

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What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

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Q: What was Jerry Sandusky's defensive philosophy at Penn State? A: Get penetration and always cover the Tight End.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I regurgitate doorknobs

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trick Question. Baby's aren't smart enough comprehend changing light bulbs

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Well, she did.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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