Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

You

Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

pigs are sometimes pink GOSH

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

Yes.

What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

if you read this you are gay

Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

Simon says; "You're adopted."

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

Where is my tractor?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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