Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

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What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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A inventor was wandering around the desert one day, then he found a magic lamp, he rubbed on it and thus came up a genie! The genie asked: What do you want? The inventor responded: Meh, no idea... Thy wish is granted, answered the genie. The now ex inventor never came up with something new ever again.. Moral: Huh?

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

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3 jews walk into a bar I lied it was a gas chamber

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Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

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My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

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You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

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How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

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Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

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A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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