Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

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Apple.

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PATHETIC

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did it hurt when you fell from heaven? cause it looked like you landed on your face

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

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a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

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What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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porcupines love sun bathing in the winter months so it dosent rape their nose hairs

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Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

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Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

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Three men walked into a bar. They looked around, saw that it was pretty crowded, and decided they'd feel more comfortable going somewhere a little less busy down the road.

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Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

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Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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Are you a tree? No.

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Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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