whyd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :)

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a black man is flying a plane what is his name Joe and the plane crashed and he died because I distracted him with this question

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names

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What did the pineapple say to the cucumber? Nothing...the pineapple was incapable of speech, for twas only an infant.

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What do you get if you pour water over a firework? A wet firework

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what's black and has a huge sac? A negro

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What did hitler say to Osama Bin Laden? Nothing they were born at different times

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why do rednecks wear big belt buckles? it's a tombstone for a dead dick:)

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Why did America nuke Japan? Because Japan bombed Pearl Harbor.

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There's my tractor.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Walking.

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Nothing, he was a fish.

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TEST! ACTUALLY READ THIS! 1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The King of the Forest is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it? You swim across. All the crocodiles are attending the animal conference.

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What do you call a nun who is just walking around? A Roman Catholic

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You like penis, That's what you live up to.

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"Knock, knock!" "Who's there?" "The police." "'The police', who?" "Sir, come out of your domicile with your hands up and no weapons present. You've just gone to an orphanage and massacred almost every nun who's worked there for almost five years. Not only that, but your son has also contracted AIDS from his previously lesbian girlfriend whom she has lost her mother too in the orphanage accident you've just caused."

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why was the man sad? he found out his wife was man .

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

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What did Helen Keller's parents do when they were displeased with her behavior? They beat the shit out of her.

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How many guys does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops