How can you tell an Irishman from a frenchman? Well, if you look back at both there heritages...

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A gay Asian guy walks into a gay bar where he found a fruity looking black man... The Asian went up to the black man and said, " how'r they hanging?" shocked with anger, the black man hits him in the face, knocks him to the ground and said, " YOU DO NOT TALK TO MY FAMILY THAT WAY. BOTH MY GRANPARENTS WERE LYNCHED!!!" the Asian stands up and brushes himself off... He turns to the black guy and says " I meant the balance scale at the table you were were sitting at" the black fellow turns to the table with the notebook and the balance scale with rocks on both sides that he was sitting at... He turns back to the Asian man and apologizes for his rude behavior and buys him a drink... (2 hours later) they have sex

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Once upon a time there were three aliens. The first alien landed in a school,The second alien landed in a market, and the third alien landed in a preschool. When the first one landed the teacher asked the students who wants to go to the computer lab,all the students said me! me! me! and the alien learned me! me! me! When the second one landed the businessman asked him what he wanted, and he saw a toy gun and it talks and the gun said gun! gun! gun! and the alien learned it and said gun! gun! gun! Then when the third alien landed one preschooler stole another preschoolers lollipop then he said "He stole my lollipop"! And the alien learned it and said "he stole my lollipop!" Then someone got murdered and the three aliens went there and the murderer detective asked "Who killed that man!" And the first alien said me! Me! Me! "What did you kill him with!" Then the second alien said gun! gun! gun! "Why'd you kill him!" Then the third alien said "He stole my lollipop!" And that's it folks! ????????????????????????????????

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What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What is worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust What is worse than the Holocaust? 3 bee stings

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How do you give an 80 year old man a heart attack? Hold a gun to his head

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Why did the downtown New York worker never make it home? An airplane crashed into his office.

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A chicken walks into a barn.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had places to be

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a shovel? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

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Why did the boy get hit by the ice cream truck? The driver of the ice cream truck was drunk

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The POLICE, now open the god damn door!

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JUST KIDDING^

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Dear Sarah, My name is Jesse, and I am severely overweight. BOUNCE ON MY DICK LIKE TYGA BITCH, Your lover, Jesse.

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why did a girl walk down the alley? because her name was alley!

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glasses, jacket, shirt They call me glasses, jacket, shirt man. I never leave the house...without my brodies. hehehe hahaha hohoho!

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Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

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Last words of a redneck - "Hold my beer and watch this"

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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Q: What's wrong with being gay A: Nothing is wrong with anybody because we're all human

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What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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What do you call a black kid on a bike? Dirt bike

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If someone tells you to look behind you do you? No

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Why did the loser end up in hospital? Because he was smoking glue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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