How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it's face.

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so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

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How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

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a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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baby seal walks into a club

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A caterpillar and its mom (a butterfly) come upon a lion eating an antelope. The caterpillar says "Mom, why is the lion so mean to the antelope?" The mom replies: "it's the circle of life." The next day, the caterpillar and his mom witness a bird of prey swooping down and eating a mouse. The caterpillar asks why the bird of prey is so mean and the mom responds by saying its the circle of life. The next day, the caterpillar and its mom come across a trail of dead animals. They follow the trail to the end where they see a great lion. The mom opens her mouth to say its the circle of life when her son jumps up and eats the lion. THE END.

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A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

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billy has 100 candy bars he eats 78 of them what does he have now diabetes

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What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

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Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

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Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

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what'd one jew say to the other jew? i cant eat this its ham. (sounds better when said with disappointed jew voice)

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar... Bartender: "hey we have a drink named after you!" Grasshopper: "What, Kevin?"

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Why is it so bad that the bus fell off the cliff? All my friends were on it.

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"Knock Knock," "Whos There?" "The Pizza Guy" "I hate pizza."

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One day a farmer was planting his crops. All of a sudden he was hit by the magic school bus.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why couldn't the kid eat candy? He had diabetes, so he could put himself in danger and possibly result in death which would leave the family torn apart and all committing suicide in a matter of 10 years.

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What did the sign say? It said slow down

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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What did Britney Spears say when she got to Paris? "Oh my God, we're in France!"

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How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

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Why did chuck Norris take his friends to the buffet? Because buffets are great social conventions due to the allowance of sharing social favors while grabbing a succulent meal. Visit golden corral today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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