What time is it? 20:45.

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

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A man walk into a bar. Just kidding he has no legs.

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Why did the chicken protest? He wanted to be able to cross the street without getting his motives questioned.

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Q) What's worse than getting dumped by text? A) Getting hit by a fridge.

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What do you get when you cross a turkey with a turtle? A bunch of nosy ass people wondering wtf you're doing.

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What did the clock say to the book? I have no batteries.

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Q. want to hear a really funny joke? A. Fred Figglie-horn

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What happens to a warehouse on a full moon? Nothing

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Why did the baby die? Cuz the father had a small dick.

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why was the black man wearing a ski mask? he was skiing.

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A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

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How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

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What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

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Why couldn't Timmy ride a bicycle? Because Timmy was a goldfish

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Why couldn't Kelly finish her test? She spontaneously combusted.

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What's worse than stepping on legos? Massive genocide

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A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

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What do you call a mexican doing drugs? An average pablo

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How do you tell if a girl is pregant? Stick a banana up her vagina pull it out and see if it has a bite on it

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"How come dinosaurs don't talk?" " I don't know. Why?" " Because they're dead."

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What's the deal with brown?

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a question.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops