What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

thumb_up thumb_down +27

If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks into a bar. Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what do u call a apple a apple

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why is a budgie Because the other leg is yellow

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's funnier than a dead baby? An episode of 'Friends'.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What does it mean if you have 5$ and Chuck Norris has 5$? Congrats! You both have five dollars!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the differences between oranges? Trees don't have doors.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

did u here bout the guy who found 500 dollars on the ground? yup he is 500 dollars richer

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a gay man? Homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the white guy sit on the bench while the black guys were playing basketball? His mother was calling, and his AP scores were coming in that day. Those scores were important to him.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats Black and White and Red all over ? A Zebra laying in a pool of its own blood.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you make a dead baby float? Ice cream, root beer, and a dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why couldnt the black guy swim? He couldn't swim because he had no parental figures growing up. His dad was part of a gang and his mom was a crack addict. He had noone to teach him how to swim.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the little girl fall of the swing? -because she had no arms Why didn't she get back up? -because she had no legs Why diddn't anyone help her? -because she was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What does a chocolate bar and a dolphin have in common? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +25

When is a door not a door? When your burns down.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the italian go to jail? because he had just robbed a bank and then brutally murdered his wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats a Quires favorite type of sport?--- A contact sport

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is more worse than death? Death

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops