A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

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What do you call an Arab with a long beard? An Arab with a long beard you stereotypical piece of crap.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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What's worse than having a mouth full of molars? A pole through your chest.

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i wonder when lachlan will come out of the closet and give keiran a blowjob

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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How do you tell the difference between a bomb and an Asian? One blows up.

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Q: what do you call a black priest A: Coley s**t

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Robin, Get in the Car

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A man walks into a bar and says he has a talking dog. He is then taken to a mental hospital and diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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Why did a boy fall off the swing at a playground? He did not have any arms.

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your mothers so silly she saw a rock and sat on a chair.......?

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Q:What is yellow and has wheels A: A banana I was joking about the wheels

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Ahem. Testicles. That is all.

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Q:Way C'nt U reed tHis? A: Because im retarted -ian surprenant

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What is the answer to the question of Life, the Universe and Everything? That doesn't make any sense.

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Roses are red violits are blue I have ADHD do you like cats?

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Sticks and stones may break my bones because I have osteoporosis

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Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

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What's do a woman's vagina and a camel's toe have in common? Other than being parts of two mammals, they have nothing in common.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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