What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

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When Miley Cyrus sticks out her tongue, people usually are there to take a photograph.

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Why do black people like bananas? Because bananas have potassium which therefore gives them bigger muscles, which is why they excel at every sport we white people suck at.

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Why did the monkey cross the road? It didn't. It died!

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What do an Eagle and a sugar cube have in common? The fact that if let to disintegrate they both turn slowly to hydrogen after a period of time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because that's where all of the other chickens are.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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tobi packs fudge+parkers gay-sami

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The entire population.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What's worse than farting in a silent class room? Denying it and farting a second time.

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Q: How is a cloud like orange juice? A: Neither have wheels.

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What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

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What has a head but can't see? A penis.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm schizophrenic. And so am I!

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Roses are red violets are blue I am in 301 Club and so are you.

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When a suicide-bomber went to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A man with no arms and no legs

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How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A **** load! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair).

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Why was the bully in detention? He punched a fellow classmate.

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I leave you with a riddle, I am round. I am an orange. What am I?

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What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

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What's worse than having sex with a woman who has been dead for 10 minutes? Having sex with a woman who has been alive for 10 minutes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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