Why couldn't the elephant ride the bike? Because it didn't have a thumb to ring the bell!

Why did the nerd cross the road?? BAZINGA!!!! xD

Penis

What's red, blue, and purple? purple.

Your mom is like a tire iron: she's a whore

Why do gingers have red hair? Its genetically encoded in their DNA

What was the difference between an Irishmen and a apple? Alot.

Have you seen the 6th sense? Nope, is it good? Yeah Bruce Willis is dead

Yo momma is so fat that her cholesterol level is above 240 mg/dL and should highly consider a vegan diet if she wishes to improve.

Knock knock ... *No ones home*

What happened when man put a dog in the blender? He got arrested for Animal abuse

Why did the chicken cross the street? Because it could without dying.

Hahaha

Did you hear about the sick juggler? Turns out he had cancer on his brain tumour.

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

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How does santa deliver presents? He doesn't, because he's not real!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust? getting raped by a giant scorpion What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher, Mr. Smith What's worse than getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher Mr. Smith? Snapping your femur bone in half What's worse than snapping your femur bone in half? Birthing a dead baby

Straight man: Gays can't have babies so they shouldn't be allowed to have sex. Gay man: But you got a vasectomy last year, so you can't make babies either. The straight man sees the irony, realizes how judgmental he has been and never has sex again because he maintains his opinion that gays shouldn't have sex.

Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

How did Chinese people get their names? They throw their pots and pans down the stairs. It says, "CHING CHANG CHONG!!!"

why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

why did 9/11 poop on a condominium? fuk

What do you call a black kid with a backpack? I don't know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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