What's 21 and pregnant? Ariana Grande

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Why did the black man call the white man a rasict? A:because he called him black.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Train A leaves the station at 1:42 while traveling in 176kmh. How long will it take for the conductor to realize the bridge it ou... Too long.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats the difference between a truck full of dead babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't pick up the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Mexican walked into a bar. He never came back out.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the alcoholic say to his priest? I'm Drunk. The priest says "Your drunk go home". He barely makes it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did Washington say to his men before they got into the boat? Men, get in the boat!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do u make a hockey player cry You Kill his entire family

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats the difference between a black guy, spook and a porch monkey? they are all stupid, stinky, n-i-g-g-e-r-s!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

There's a fine line between hyphenated words

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are eating lunch on a bridge. The Mexican drops his taco off the side of the bridge and the Italian and American were kind enough to share some of their lunch with the Mexican making it a successful picnic. Their ethnicity was not relevent at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many men do you have to have sex with to show that you're gay? But, I'm a woman!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the main difference between an angry white man and an angry black man? The angry black man is probably of African descent.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are grey Violets are gray Tulips are grey Lilly's are grey Dandelions are grey Daisy's are grey Daffodils are grey I am colour blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

"Have you guys ever seen Derrek Ashmores sisters? They are DTF if you know what I mean" - Jesse Ziegenbein

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops