What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

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A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

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Yo mama so fat that.....NooNoooNooooooo (strips)

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A drunk guy walks into a bar. A blind man walks into the same bar.

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What do you call a boy with no arms? Names.

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Why are butt pirates butt pirates? Because they just ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR FRUITS

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Q.Why was the man so fat A. because he had to much to eat

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what did the captcha say to the homo sapien? frTrewQui NiolismTU

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A boy says he is going to commit suicide. To stop him, a friend tells him not to do it, he'll regret it later in life.

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2 guys get into a fight over a girl.....the girl walks out

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How did a baby get across the street? Stapled to a chicken.

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What's clear and wet? water

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Shit... Shit who? Wrong house... Do I know you Shitt Ronghouse? Yes. Please come in. Okay.

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Q- what the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? A- The Wheelchair

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What's Green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? About 4:30, unless he's running late, stuck in traffic, had to get gas.

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What Do You Call a Hawk in Virginia? A Hawk What Do you Call a Hawk that lives in Virginia? Virgian Hawk

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Your Mom

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How do you stop a baby alien from crying? Watch what its mother does to soothe it and then try and copy that.

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Why did the little boy cry? I cut off his toes one by one and shoved fireworks up his ass

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What is funnier then a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown!

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if quizzes are quizzical, arent tests testical?

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Q: What do you call the first black guy who swam in the ocean? A: Triangle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops