What's the best part of having sex with twenty eight year olds? They are of the legal age

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Why was Susie crying? There was a frog stapled to her face.

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How do you scare a Jew Hold your lighter up and blow out the flame and I've toward him real slowly and see how much drama he'll cause

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What do you call a cat with no tail? A Manx cat

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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your mom gave me head.....phones

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Who's a pedophile and not afraid to show it? The clown from McDonald

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So, these two antennas were getting married. The wedding was great, but the reception was terrible!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Kevin Spacey is Kaiser Solze

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Why did the handicap man scream for help? Because he fell out of his wheel chair

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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I am a nigger.

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Why did the little kid fall down? He was pushed

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Why didn't the Priest have a TV ? A black man stole it

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What do people and jelly beans have in common? Nothing. One is a living creature, and the other is a tasty treat.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

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Conner Schmidt's fiance has the fattest ass in the world <3

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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!

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Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... whats worst than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

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Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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