What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

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What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

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Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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69

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Yo mama so fat she doesn't need news, shes worldwide. ~YN~

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Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

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Quizno's footlongs are four dollars...

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So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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what is brown and shaped like a tree?

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Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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