Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The Olympics

thumb_up thumb_down -40

How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

thumb_up thumb_down -44

why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

thumb_up thumb_down -104

Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

thumb_up thumb_down +197

Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

thumb_up thumb_down +85

what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +61

What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats the difference between an oven and a Jew? An oven is a manufactured and creates heat through the power of electricity or natural gas

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

when ever i finish a sentence say im a man Me :i met a girl You:im a man Me: i invited her to my place You: im a man Me: we sleept together You:im a man Me:she wisperd in my ear You: im a man

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

Q: What was Jerry Sandusky's defensive philosophy at Penn State? A: Get penetration and always cover the Tight End.

thumb_up thumb_down -97

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops