Q: Why didn't the little boy get his bike for christmas? A: He died from cancer

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A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

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Want to hear a joke? Me too.

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Yo mamma's so fat, that she weighs alot.

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Why did the black guy get kicked out of the bar? He was riding a jack hammer

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Knock knock who's there I killed your family

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What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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Why does people with tourettes curse so much? Fuck should I know?

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Little kids wear superman underwear. Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear.

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Whats the best way to get to a girls heart? A knife.

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Why didn't Rebecca Black take the bus? Because she would have had a heart attack with all of the seat choices.

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What's funnier than Justin Bieber dying in a car accident? Nicky Minaj being in the same car.

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With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

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When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

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why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

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What did the Nazi put into the oven? Bread.

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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roses are red, violets are blue.

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ask me if im deaf. are you deaf? ...............

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What did bob order at pizza hut? Pizza

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What's worse than being a ginger? Being a soulless ginger

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm ovulating

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If 32x=8600, find x. ^ | There it is!

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Donkey lips

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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