A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.. wait wut are u a bitch Violet are not freakin blue its Purple

What's the easiest way to become filthy rich? There are many ways to earn money. Invest some time into researching the topic.

How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A **** load! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair).

A Mexican, an Italian and an American all walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have pleasant conversation, and all return home to loving families safely and securely.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea, and neither does the chicken, for chickens do not possess the ability to reason.

Why couldn't the woman drive the car? Because she was a woman.

whats the difference between G. Bush and a rock? Bush (bull)shits and rock doesn't

i love to lick...

Knock Knock. Shut up.

Michel Moor on a die...

Q: you know whats a good movie? A: twilight.

Why is Kony so mean? He used to date your mom.

Question: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Answer: Being raped by a giant scorpion.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust? getting raped by a giant scorpion What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher, Mr. Smith What's worse than getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher Mr. Smith? Snapping your femur bone in half What's worse than snapping your femur bone in half? Birthing a dead baby

The other day a man came to my door. After I opened it, he told me, "I'm sorry, your mother is dead." He paused, then said, "Just kidding." "Actually," I told him, "my mom died two years ago of natural causes." He turned around and left, and I closed the door. All in all, it was a very confusing situation, and I'm not sure how I feel about it.

What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

What did one Chinese man say to the other? ?????

What do you call a black man on your front porch? -Racism is a serious and non humorous problem.

A priest, a pedophile, and a child rapist walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

A man and his horse walk into a bar, he is told to leave because animals are not allowed on the property

you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

TRENT EGENLAUF IS a LITTLE BOY

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...