Want to hear a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jonny took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke again? Bubbles was the girl next door, Jonny raped her.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a cult leader and a television personality? On average, 3.2 inches.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many chinese women can you fit in a car? About the same amount as men.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You're so gay that you lost your virginity to someone of the same gender.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why is 6 afraid of 7 its not, they actually have a domestic partnership going

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's red and hurts your teeth. Answer: a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did OJ Simpson say to the blonde? "Don't worry, I'm not going to murder you"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

jcjdj

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 2,091,029,203,284,485,389,684,564,345,089,859,849,485,374,094,394,584,584.00002394832323945834958349234854343432323343534342323243543534234358394564023285409564053942304923049234 x 10 to the 1234543565342312323560845834034th power divided by 0.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: whats the differences between a bra and the canucks?? A: a bra has two cups

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Top ten reasons Microsoft Doors is better than Microsoft Windows. 1. Easier to open. 2. Doors do not crash... Windows does! 3. Watching pron? Your mother around? JUST SLAM THAT SHlT ON HER FACE! 4. Saves power! (Its easier to just shut and open doors) 5. Doors are a lot easier to get trough than windows. 6. When windows wishes you welcome the first time you install it, you still cant wipe your damn feet on it! 7. Its easier to surf on the internet on top of doors than on windows. 8. While Windows is easy to hack because you can try codes forever, you can just buy a good lock on your door and shut it. 9.The sun glaring on your screen trough your windows? GET MICROSOFT DOORS! 10. I dare you make one, i live doing this shit. Capcom before. And special thanks to you! Thanks for playing! Capcom now: Fuck off thats not DLC paywall! its actual downloadable only content! Just pay 45 bucks to get all colors to all characters.... ...Downloading Allcolors 10kb

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the little girl cry? Because she saw her future.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the black guy good at basketball? When buying African American Slaves the masters often sought attributes that would be useful for manual labor such as agricultural work. The slaves who met these criteria had more chances to pass on their better, more beneficial genetic info via sexual intercourse with other slaves. Through many generations the most beneficial traits such as fine motor control in the phalanges and overall strength were passed down. This is very similar to Darwin's Theory of Evolution.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's tan, red, black and brown? Your face. Two days later... In the mausoleum. "Your face"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why didn't the hispanic muslim woman vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 primaries? Because she lives in Connecticut where the primaries have not yet taken place.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Thats sweet, thank you then.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the plane crash because it was 9-11

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the lady find out when she went to the doctor. She had breast cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

When life gives you lemons, thank life for its generosity.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A guy who plays shooting games acquires an assault rifle but he doesn't kill anyone, why? Because he was a nice and peaceful man who loves his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the boy and girl go under the covers together? because they were cold

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops