What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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the danced cus they were young, they danced cus they were free, but mostly the danced cus they needed to pee

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Roses are red, violets are blue if God makes us beautiful, Who made you?

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-Knock Knock ~Who's there? -It's your mother ~Go away

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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why did the disabled man go to the shops? because he wanted a radiator panel

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What do you get hanging from an apple tree? Sore Arms.

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A man walks into a bar, and says ouch.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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- kellen says to bill "your a fruit cake" - bill say to raj "your a gypsy" - raj says to kellen "you have gingevitis" R.I.P kellen 2012

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WEED!

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Whats white and bad for your teeth? A refridgerator

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Your mother is so fat that when she steps on a scale it shows her a weight that she is not very satisfied with

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How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

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Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

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You know what's funny? Clowns.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

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Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

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A blonde and a brunette nearly fell off a cliff and were hanging on for dear life. The brunette found the strength to climb back onto the ledge. The blonde was impressed and had muscular dystrophy so she lost the strength to hold on any longer and fell to her death.

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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A man works at a brick factory. He is told by his boss that if he is to steal any brick from the factory, he will be sacked. But every day the man steals one brick and puts it in his lunch box to take home and is not caught. One day he has enough bricks to build a house, and he says "When I build this house there will be none left over". The house is now built and while the man is taking a look around he stubs his toe on something, he looks down to see a brick and he sighs, picks up the brick and throws it in the air. There are two pilots driving a plane, one has a dog and one has a wardrobe. One pilot says to the other "I don't particularly like dogs" then the other pilot says to him "I don't really like wardrobes". They then make an agreement and throw both the wardrobe and the dog out the window. Five minutes later one pilot looks out the window out onto the plane wing, and guess what he sees? A brick.

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Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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