Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

What's the difference between a smashed watermelon and a dead black person? One is a minor slip of the hands and the other is a fatal accident involving a human being.

If your waiting in a restaurant for a waiter, doesn't that make you a waiter? O.o

Why did the chicken cross the street? Because the light was red and cars had stopped.

Q: What's the answer to this question? A: The question to this answer.

racism...deal with it!

How do you know when a bag of chips is stale? It is past the expiration date.

yo mamas so old she probably ralises the greater risk of breast cancer in middle age women.

ring ring,Who is? you'r face.you'r face how?you'r but hole face.

Q: What did the Big Bad Wolf say to Little Red Riding Hood? A: Nothing, wolfs are mentally nor physically capable of talking

Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

Why did a black person get gingivitis? He repeatedly didn't brush which caused both dental plaque and tartar getting filled with harmful bacteria, and if they aren't removed from teeth, they will begin to irritate the gums and cause gingivitis.

Why did Sally fall off the swingset? She had no arms. Knock ,Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Earlier that morning the farmer's daughter had inadvertently left the gate to the yard open as she was preoccupied by her worry over a maths test set for that day. She hadn't studied for the test as she was still deeply distressed over her fathers recent heart attack. This, coupled with the added burden of household chores now delegated to her because her mother was out trying to get the west field prepared for sowing, had made her quite forgetful and distracted of late. Whilst several chickens escaped, only one strayed so far that it actually encountered the road facing the farm. After crossing the road and gorging itself in a soy-bean crop, the chicken was struck by a furniture remover's van as it attempted to make its way home. Several hours later the dead chicken was spotted by a Community Mental Health Worker who was doing his bi-weekly rural clinic run. The chicken, being a bantam, caught the eye of the Mental Health worker, who was a keen trout fisherman. "Cool" thought the mental health worker- "those feathers will make for excellent trout flies". He stopped and plucked a handful of the most iridescent blue, green and orange feathers and placed them in an envelope. He rolled himself a cigarette, sat on the trunk of his car and admired the clouds. "God, I love this job", he muttered to no one in particular.

Why does a black person buy water? Because everyone needs water to survive SKH RZH

What did one computer say to the other? 100111010100100111001010010001110101110010100010101011010011010010111000010101100100100100001101010000011111010010011010100110101001010100101010101010100101011010010010101010110010110010100100010101010101010

a boy fell in mud... a kid took a bath with bubbles... bubbles was the girl next door!

a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

What happened to the man who killed his family? Rape.

Why is it pointless to brutally kill and dismember a Japanese man? You'd be satisfying his sexual fetish.

roses are red so are the jews every one loved that holocaust news

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

Whats worse than a pile of dead baby's? Being raped by a giant scorpion. Well that escalated quickly. Also i'm gonna call the cops.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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