Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What is long and hard that a bride gets on her wedding night? An erect penis.

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If you can't read this, you should think about optical enhancement surgery. If you can, however, you just wasted 5 seconds of your life doing so.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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what happend to Helen Keller when she fell in a hole She climed out of the hole

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Q: What is black and can't support a family? A: A bowling ball

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What did bob order at pizza hut? Pizza

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid the avoid the nuclear bomb at hiroshima

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Yo mamas so stupid that she has a condition called autism

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Yo mamma's so fat, that she weighs alot.

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This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

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Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

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Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

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Your Mom is so fat... I'm sorry I didn't mean that.. I have abandonment issues.

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What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

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Why didn't Angie die when she jumped off the Empire State Building? She landed on a pancake

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

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A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

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Did i just hear a joke about birds? No? Well this is Hawkward.

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Why did the man stop eating? Because he took an arrow to the knee.

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If the blue man lives in the blue house, the red man lives in the red house and the green man lives in the green house, where does the orange man live? In the orange house.

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A middle aged bald man goes to Chuck E. Cheese with a hood and a lump in his back pocket. He has a somewhat enjoyable time with his offspring and leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops