There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

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your mommas so fat because she has diabetes

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what is the difference between a black person and a white person there skin

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WELL YOU ARE ALL A ROOF. So pie, my dearest Adam. Like a butthole.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

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So a man walks into a bar, asks for a beer, then drinks it. He then goes home expecting to have dinner with his wife and 2 kids. His wife smells his breath before that and asks him what happens. The men opens to his true and only love and tells her he's having a bad time at work. So they share a hug and talk about it. The man is then renewed, starts pulling up at his job and gets a promotion to general supervisor. He lives happily and watches his kids grow and become professionals. He then dies of a heart attack at the advanced age of 89 while he was watching his favorite TV show.

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Show me the money! Said the man last wednesday.

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Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

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How do you stop a rhino from charging? Kill it

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Why did the Black guy work at KFC? To provide money for his struggling family.

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Whats funnier than 24, 69

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Jimmy tells his mom he wants to be a Firefighter when he grows up to which the mother replies, "You can't Jimmy, you have leukemia."

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Roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you, f*** you.

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What do you call a gay scientologist? His first name or last name, depending on how close you 2 are.

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Why was the black man smoking marijuana with his friends? He was at a glaucoma support group meeting.

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What's the square root of everything. F**K LOGIC

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whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

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I like to use vasoline during sex. I put it on the doorknob so she can't escape.

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What did the homeless man do with his trolley full of aluminium cans, He took them to the scrapyard and sold them as this is his only source of income right now

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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What is the differnce between a baby and a watermelon??? One is fun to smash and one is a watermelon

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hey John will you make some copies

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What did the zebra say to the giraffe? Nothing, they can't talk dipshit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops