Q: What do you call it when you get shot in the face 20 times with a shotgun? A:Nothing, you're dead. Q:What do we call it when you get shot 20 times with a shotgun? A: A blessing.

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What's red and sweet and good to eat? A riddle that rhymes.

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How do you call a gay that is playing poker with friends You say "call" and place the right amount of fiches on the table, at that moment you are still in the race to win the pot.

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why did the cow die because she ate poisoned apple pie

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Jamie stegman is a masive idiot and does not have a life at all he is a tool which is true becuase no one likes him

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two muffins were in an oven, one muffin said to the other, " ohmygod! its so hot in here!" the other muffin said,"AHHHHHH!!!! its a talking muffin!!"

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you and your family will die tonight

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If you're riding on a jet ski and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a car? Blue. Because Ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "It sure is hot in here." The other muffin says "Holy shit a talking muffin

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What did the blind man say to the bartender? Nothing, I forgot to mention he's also mute and has no legs.

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Knock knock whos there? Underware Underware who? I underware my friends are

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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Q: Whats the difference between a pile of dead babys and a Ferrari? A: I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Congress back then: No sooner had I ended this prayer than a pederast farted on my right. "Hah! a good omen," said I, and prostrated myself; then I burst open the door by a vigorous push with my arse, and, opening my mouth to the utmost, shouted, "Senators, I wanted you to be the first to hear the good news; since the war broke out, I have never seen anchovies at a lower price!"

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Why did the fat chick have a camel toe? She was half camel

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Ahhh! Grandpa your going too hard!

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8

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what happens every day? People die

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The MLS

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A muslim guy walks into a bar and orders a water as he isnt allowed to drink alcohol

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What did the janitor have for breakfast? Food

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Neither have I

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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