Is Charlie Sheen bi-polar? Yes.

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Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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A drunk guy walks into a bar. A blind man walks into the same bar.

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2 guys are on a scaffolding. One of them says to the other "If you fall from here, theres a high probability you will die"

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Q: what is green, red, white, on fire, in space A: i dont know you tell me

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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There's a god, just kidding.

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Why are some people so awesome? Because their black.

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What does andy and burger king have in common? Nothing, thats why she is now banging josh!

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My grandpa asked me a very important question right before he kicked the bucket. Grandpa: Son, how far do you think I could kick this bucket?

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Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

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Why does Frank hate Jim? He killed his son.

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Jews

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend "I know. You need to quit gnawing when you're giving me a blow job."

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What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

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Where do cows go when they're bored? Wherever they're standing. Cows cannot use toilets, regardless of their mood.

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A man orders chinese food. His wife says "Honey, where's the cat?"

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What do ghosts get whaen they watch porn ? a boner

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who did the strait guy marry? a woman

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What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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A Priest, Rabbi, and a Minister walk into a bar... i forgot the rest of the joke, but your mothers a whore!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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