Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Roses are red Violets are astronaut This joke didn't make sense I'll kill u with a rake

thumb_up thumb_down +35

EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A plane full of atheists, with one Christian, crashes into a field over Ohio. Everybody but the Christian dies upon impact. Amazed, a news reporter on the scene of the crash, asks the man, "How did you suvive this tragic event?" "I had a parachute." Responds the man.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man is at a party. He gets hungry so he waits in the foodline and then he gets some food. Then he has to go to the bathroom so he waits in the bathroomline and goes to the bathroom. Then he is thirsty so he goes to get some punch and realizes that there is no punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's big and messy? A big mess

thumb_up thumb_down +31

10 mexicans were driving in a car and went off a cliff. what happend? No one cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Whats as flat as a pancake and alive Ya nan being flattened by a truck on the motorway

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the bus driver lose his family in a car accident? Bc the little boy was seeking revenge

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why did the duck fall in the water? It got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

thumb_up thumb_down +27

ok guys finish this joke: Im the biggest fag-got because_____________.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

when a midget takes weed, does he get high or medium???

thumb_up thumb_down +27

24

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A black man walks into a house and is shot because it is not his house and it is 2 in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks in to a bar. He then walks in to a different bar, and later that evening he goes into a different third bar. That man is a bar critique.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why was the girl crying? - Someone pooped on her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a black guy riding a unicycle? A black guy riding a unicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

This one time at band camp....

thumb_up thumb_down +25

An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops