What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? An amputation.

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What's the difference between your cat and mine? Yours has legs.

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Oh yeah? Well you're as gay as this joke!

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what happened to the kid who didn't get what he wanted for his birthday? He committed suicide

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What do a fish and a frog have in common? They can both live in water. Its a well known fact.

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How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

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What do you call a black man on steroids? Strong.

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Chickens want to live in a world where they arent judged for cossing a road ......... K?

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. (do you get it cause the robot has no arms)

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The king asked the jester why was he not telling jokes. He wasn't because he's a jester and therefore is obligated to be funny.

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What's worse than a Holocaust in your apple? What.

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because fish don't have legs and can't walk anywhere

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What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

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Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

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What can fly? Lots of things

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Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar and says "Lipstick is the blood of all wounds." The bartender does not know how the kangaroo said this or why.

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What was unprecedented about Roosevelt running for president in 1940? He had polio, he couldn't run!

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What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

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Bacon is delcious.

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One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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