What mouse walks on 2 legs, Micky mouse. What duck walks on 2 legs, All ducks you dip shit.

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A white rapper. HAHAHAHAHAHA oh ya he was muslim.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face? the skeleton replies I have aids.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' Thats fantastic for Peter Piper

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A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

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A black man walks into a bar. His parents were immigrants from South Africa.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

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Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

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What is black and goes blub-blub? A black blub-blub. Good job. What is red and goes blub-blub? There is no such thing as a red blub-blub, you idiot.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

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what did the caterpillar say to the butterfly? Im gonna turn into you.

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Why did the baby cross the road? 'cause i kicked it.

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What do you call ugly? Dionne Dodds

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If 2 trains are going 60 mph, their going in opposite directions towards each other, they are slowing down 1 mile per hour per 10 miles and they are 100 miles away, would you rather have Coke or Pepsi?

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Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

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How many ecotards does it take to change a light globe? Ve Vill Change all ze light globes to use;less grey vuns and you vill luv it or else ve vill kill you to save ze planet

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What happened when the prisoner dropped the soap? He picked it up.

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What about all the bullshit comments? The spamming?

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Q. what is the difference between a black man and a park bench A. a parkbench can support a family A black man cannot

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why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

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you are getting chased by a lion, a tiger, and a zebra. What do you do???? Get off the Merry-go-round.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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