Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Your doorbell is broken.

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Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Guess no ones home.

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What do you call a room with a white man a black man and a hot pocket? A reasonable meal

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was black

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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whats orange, green and has a treadmill attached to it? a cantaloupe, i lied about the treadmill.

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A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

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Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

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titanic vs 9/11 who would win? Well the titanic backwards is a ship which saves lives and 9/11 backwards is a building on fire spitting out airplanes

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Why did Helen Keller always ride in the passenger seat? so she could SUCK THE DRIVERS D!CK!!!!!!!!!

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A man knocks on a wooden door. A woman says who is it?

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A brick bent down to suck my flapjack, Then he got stuck, oh what the unpleasant, This angered the brick, he lay on the grass, he shoved a stick straight up his bellybutton.

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lipstick pig

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In Soviet Russia... People Die for Voicing their Opinions

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Why was Sally gone for her father's birthday? She went on a camping trip with her friends. Sally's friends were brutally murdered and she was kidnapped. The kidnapper cut off her arms and legs and left her in the middle of a suburban intersection late at night. The autopsy revealed that Sally died from blood loss from losing her limbs. It also revealed that she had contracted a fast growing tumor in her brain which would have most likely killed her within days of the murder anyway. Her family was living in the country illegally so her DNA did not reveal a computer file of her person. Her parents were not informed of her death for years because of this. When it was determined that the victim was the parents' daughter they were arrested for living in the country illegally and were not able to have a funeral.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater!

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a blond a her blond boyfriend were walking acrossed a river. she gose over the river but the ramp brecks when she's past. her boyfriend says wait until night and I'll get a flashlight and shine it acrossed get on the light beem and walk acrossed.she says no when I'm haf way acrossed you will turn the light off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

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What do you call a nun who is just walking around? A Roman Catholic

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, the highest he placed was 4th.

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What is the difference between a duck? One of it's legs are both the same!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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