i hate christians and muslims, until drugs are involved. iduno what dat is, i try it.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I began as a dreamer, then I became a visionary, then I saw my dream come true, until it shattered us all. Do you believe that perhaps, there are people out there, trying to stop the world from reaching a better age?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the kid with poleo get for christmas. whatever he has on his christmas list because his parents feel bad for passing down the genetic information(DNA) that gave him poleo.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Scenario: A man is being mugged in an alley Mugger: Give me your wallet! I have a gun! Victim: You don't have the balls. Mugger: Oh yeah! I have 3 balls! Victim: Well I have 2, you should probably get that checked.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Bob: Hey bro Jim: ... Bob: You're dead! Jim: Yep.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

25

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a black man walking towards you with a gun? A defibrillator.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the lights turn off? Because I turned them off.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A chicken walks into a McDonald's and the cashier asked the chicken what he would like to order. A man waiting for his meal walked out realizing that the employees of this restaurant were not who he wanted making his food.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you make people run? When someone is behind you, hold the door open and wait.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Spoiling your fun. Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the fuck are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

In soviet russia, roses are violet

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I told my wife she was like a fine wine She asked if it was because she improves with age. I told her yes All was well.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the gay person cry? he was said that he couldn't marry his boyfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

216-409-7176 Call me.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

a disabled person walked into a bar..oh wait

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops