A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

There was a black and white spotted dog named Louis. Why did they call her that? Because, that's what they named her.

What is it called when a whole bunch of black people run down a hill? A race.

How do you make a bull angry? Light it on fire

Sticks and stones can break my bones Well maybe you shouldn't play in the tree anymore

Hey, have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. Neither has he.

what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

a blond girl walks into a bar

What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory because she kept throwing away the w's

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You just glass her.

This little pig went to market, This little pig stayed at home, This little pig had pork chops, And this little pig was GONE...

Why cant a black man and a white man cant be friends? Because bont mens are racist

Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

If Daniel has 3 concaved man boobs, and Isabelle has 13 homosexual friends, what is the ratio of dolphins to African rapists? Wenis, because Jimmy was raped last night.

Brown Bear, Brown Bear what do you see? I see some poachers looking at that tiger over there.

How do you count all the jews in a village? The United States Census Bureau usually has reliable data so I would start there

What's worse than breaking your leg and not being able to walk? Breaking your neck because you will most likely not be able to walk from the high probability of being paralyzed for the rest of your life.

A Blonde arives at the airport late, and misses her flight. The airline provides her with a complimentary ticket for a later flight and she departs on that.

Q: What's funnier than a baby in a blender? A: A baby in a clownsuit in a blender.

What starts with a P and ends with O-R-N? porn

yo mama so fat that the doctor asked for her weight not her phone number!

Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

Q:What do you call a duck that can fly? A:Bird.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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