Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why was 7 afraid of 8, cause 8,9,10

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Your grandma's cookies.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What happens if you roll a nickel down a street in Mexico? It eventually stops and lands on its side.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A middle aged bald man goes to Chuck E. Cheese with a hood and a lump in his back pocket. He has a somewhat enjoyable time with his offspring and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q) A black man and a white man are playing a basketball game, who will win? A) The one who scores the most points.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did cancer get for Christmas? Another 6 year old boy

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made this particular man mad which drove him to tell the other man to shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Welcome to die!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between liberals and communists? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I have a joke. Okay, tell me. Just kidding

thumb_up thumb_down +12

"knock knock" "Come in"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What would Jesus do? Something worthy of having him nailed to a cross.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why can't Amy Winehouse sing? She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why doesn't little billy eat his vegetables at the dinner table... Because billy has bin dead for 3 years

thumb_up thumb_down +12

You know whats worse than finding 3 dead children in your house? Finding 2 dead children in your house.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops