Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

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Alex Gedrose.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

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What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you suck your own dick.

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where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

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getting a call from the hospital saying that your whole entire family was all killed in an explosion and they were killed from your best friend.

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why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Shit... Shit who? Wrong house... Do I know you Shitt Ronghouse? Yes. Please come in. Okay.

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"Lady's and Gentlemen, hobos and trams Cross side mosquitoes and bald legged ants Pull up a chair and sit on the floor and I'll tell you I've never heard before Of one bright day in the middle of night Two dead boys got up to fight Back to Back they faced each other Drew their swords and shot each other A deaf policeman heard the noise Came and killed the two dead boys If you don't believe this lie is true Ask the blind man he saw it too"

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How do you get really high at home? You climb a ladder

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Why is it pointless to brutally kill and dismember a Japanese man? You'd be satisfying his sexual fetish.

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Mr.Green walks into the class. He is alone with no wife and no kids and suffers from depression. His salary is below average and he can't pay the rent this week so he'll probably get evicted. He has aids. He will die in 2 weeks.

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Im going to the patriots jets game this year..... When the kick a feild goal and you see two kids wearing lime green holding up a poster that says BRADY LIKES SAGGY BALLS that will be me and my friend -RT

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why did the computer crash? it didn't

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What is yellow, smooth, and dangerous? Shark-infested custard

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Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

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Why was the black man sent to prison? He was wrongfully accused of a crime which is a fine example of how flawed today's justice system is.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water jack fell down and broke his neck and he was dead... The End

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square circles have souls but gingers do not CC

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops