A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

why was 7 afraid of 8, cause 8,9,10

What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin'

What did Super man say when the bullets didn't hurt him? That didn't hurt.

Whats 10-5(45+76)? please help my homework is due next class and i am currently to busy worrying about my dad's cancer to think about this problem.

Q: what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? A: A very unfortunate individual.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

Why doesn't little billy eat his vegetables at the dinner table... Because billy has bin dead for 3 years

Why can't Amy Winehouse sing? She's dead.

What would Jesus do? Something worthy of having him nailed to a cross.

"knock knock" "Come in"

I have a joke. Okay, tell me. Just kidding

Why did Johnny fall down? Because I threw tropical fruit at him.

You know whats worse than finding 3 dead children in your house? Finding 2 dead children in your house.

What did cancer get for Christmas? Another 6 year old boy

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

Welcome to die!

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made this particular man mad which drove him to tell the other man to shut up.

What's the difference between liberals and communists? Nothing.

Q) A black man and a white man are playing a basketball game, who will win? A) The one who scores the most points.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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